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Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?

 By: Joyce Carol Oates

            Connie believed she was above everyone else regarding looks and social status, until her being above boring family gatherings forced her into a dangerous situation, which she could not handle.  Connie was a fifteen-year-old girl who always went out with her friends and never thought about anyone but herself.  Connie was comfortable in her everyday situation because nothing changed until one night when she was leaving the drive through restaurant and a man was staring at her.  “She couldn’t help glancing back, and there he was still watching her.”  Connie was so self absorbed that she had to see if the boy was still staring at her even if it made her a little uncomfortable.   Later on, Connie refused to attend a family barbeque, believing that she was above it, which posed a perfect opportunity for danger since she would be home alone.  The creepy man that she first saw at the drive through arrived at her house and tried to coax her outside.  She kept talking to him, which she should not have done.  Soon enough the man made Connie uncomfortable, a feeling she seldom had.  By the time Connie decided that the man was a threat to her, it was too late.  The man, Arnold Friend (his name is ironic seeing as he is not a “friend” at all), had already “gotten inside her head.”  Through his vulgar, intimidating and overpowering words, Arnold was able to gain complete control over Connie.  He charmed her into listening to him and then he took advantage of the fact that Connie was self-absorbed and listing to every word he said, especially those that were meant to flatter her. Once he made her vulnerable, he then began to make her subject to the guilt, that if she did not follow his orders anything bad that happened to her family would be her fault.  Out of fear for what might happen to her family, Connie obeys the orders and condemns herself to a horrible fate.  When Arnold threatens Connie’s family, all of a sudden she no longer cares about how she looks or anything else to do with herself she cares about her family and their fate.  For example, when Connie first heard the car coming up the drive she said, ‘“Christ. Christ,”’ wondering how she looked.”  However later on, after Arnold has gotten inside her head, and told her that if she did not do what he said, her “people”, meaning her family, would suffer the consequences.  She obeys his orders in sort of a trance.  Unfortunately, she ends up going outside, just as Arnold wanted her to do all along, and most likely being raped and killed.  If Connie had not been so self-absorbed (or had taken IMPACT Self-Defense for Women), she might have come out of the situation unharmed and alive.

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